My grandmother and I decided to go to the doctor around noon. Once we arrived, we were welcome by a friendly lady. My grandma then asked if there were any avaliable appointments for me. The nice lady then responded,"Yes! You can see the doctor now, if you'd like." My grandmother responded,"Now is good." Before I knew it, I was taking an eye exam that surprisingly only lasted ten minutes. After the doctor evaluated my eye-sight, he said I was eligible for contact lenses and he explained to my grandma that he was going to send my prescription to a contact lenses company. Now all my grandmother had to do was pay and sign a form saying that she did so; we were coming back tomorrow.
The following day, we returned to the doctor once more. We were greeted by the same friendly woman. She already knew that we had came back to pick up the lenses so she asked for my last name. I responded,"Bishun." The lady then searched for my name and within seconds she had pulled out three boxes. Two were concerning the contact lenses, the other for something called "Eye Care Solution." Before we could leave, I had to try on one of the the lenses. I had to be guided on how to put it on. At first it was a little tough, but then it became a little easier and I got it in. Immediately, I noticed the difference. One eye was clear and the other was blurry. I felt such a weird sensation! Excited, I reached for the second one and tried to put it in. Yes! They were both in now. The lady then said,"Great job! Now you can go test them outside." I did just that. Once I got outside, I looked around. My world was so clear and different now. It was as if I was seeing everything in a high definition TV screen. The lenses were like clear windows that opened up my vision to the world. It was amazing! I said to myself I love the new me. Once I got back inside, I told my grandmother the news. I said,"Wow! It felt like my world was just in HD." She starts to laugh and then says,"You think your the man now?" At that moment we both bursted into laughter.
-Armani B.-
Here's what works in this vignette:
ReplyDeleteThe connection between your group's theme/image and the subject of your vignette.
The idea of the transformation of your vision--being able to see anew and clearly.
Here's what doesn't work:
Almost every sentence has at least one error in mechanics. Did you re-read this? Did you have anyone else re-read it? You must correct these for an upgrade.